One thing I’m truly embarrassed to share is the fact that I’m not spontaneous- at all. Ready to find out how bad I am? Just a couple of weeks ago, my family and I went on a trip to Walgreens to buy deodorant. The entire day I’d planned it. We’d go to Walgreens, buy deodorant, go to the grocery store to get waters, and go home.
So I’m walking out of Walgreens feeling victorious when I see my husband step out of the car, look at the Redbox machine excitedly, and look at me and smile. Without hesitation, I said in a loud stern voice, “NO.” He proceeded to give me the most confused, “Are you talking to me?!” face ever and say, “What?!”
Thank God my husband still loves me regardless of my lack of spontaneity and isn’t phased by my dramatic reactions when something throws me off my mission because sometimes I even shock myself. Did I really just have a mini heart attack over a Redbox detour?! Within a minute I realized how ridiculous I was being and I needed to chill out and be just down for a Redbox night. After all, it was Friday night!
Now that I know that’s one of the quirks of my personality, I can quickly catch myself out when I’m being unreasonable. But before I knew that, I would’ve totally felt justified about sticking to the plan 100% and argued my way out of it.
And there’s a lot more I didn’t know. I truly thought that some of my beliefs about how things should be were truly that- how things should be! That’s the stuff you don’t learn in school. We don’t learn anything about our personalities or emotional intelligence. That’s the stuff the we either learn the hard way, we have life-smacking experiences that force us to change, we learn through spirituality, or we don’t learn at all and keep suffering.
I recently started studying the best personality typing system I’ve ever come across yet and it’s totally thrown me for a loop. It’s called the Enneagram. It took me a little bit to figure out that my dominant type is 6- The Loyalist and, when I did, so much about me started to make sense. I’m also delving into all the other personality types to better understand myself, my kids, my husband, and other people in my life. What’s cool about the enneagram is that it describes our personalities based on our motivations, our fears, attitudes, and behaviours. It’s not like the labels used in psychiatry- which put us in a box. You can find your dominant type and then learn about the other behaviours that influence you. It’s totally worth checking out.
For months, one of my mentors has been telling me to read, The Road Back to You by Ian Cron. I just finally picked it up a few days ago and I can’t stop reading it! Plus, it’s hilarious. So I thought I’d share it with you.
You can click here to order “The Road Back to You” on Amazon.
The holidays are coming and there may be people in your life that trigger you a lot. Ever since I’ve learned about the Enneagram I’ve been able to understand the people in my life much better and give them more grace. I hope that this book can bring a little resolve for you too. I’ve actually been doing a mini book club with a friend of mine and we’re reading it together to discuss it and get more out of it. Plus, it’ll be a bonus for us to be better friends to each other!
Once you’ve started to dive in, let me know what you think and what you’ve learned about your personality type!!
Image Credit: Your Enneagram Coach
