I’m covering lots of good topics in this episode with my guest, Jamie Michelle the host of the Permission to Thrive Radio Show. We talked about how she went from disordered eating and body dysmorphia to an award winning body image coach. We get into so many topics like how to acknowledge and make peace with where you’re at so that you can take the steps forward you need to and learn how to thrive. You’ll learn how to identify what you truly believe about yourself so that you can begin to shift our perspective from low self-worth to thriving. And even how we can shift from negative feelings into positive ones throughout our day to day. This episode is packed with insight so tune into this episode of Grace for Breakfast! Click here to listen >>
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About Jamie Michelle:
Jamie Michelle is the CEO and Founder of Jamie Shelly, LLC and I’ve been in the health & fitness industry for nearly 10 years. She helps women who are in search for a solution to their struggle with their body, their weight, and food.
She is an award winning Body Image Coach (2019 Top Body Image Coach of the Year through International Association of Top Professionals)
She passionate about guiding women to release limiting beliefs & create new thought patterns that are in alignment with who they really are at their core. We are the creators of our own experience!
Links Mentioned:
Interview on Jamie Michelle’s, Permission to Thrive
Transcription
Iviana: [00:00:00] You’re listening to episode 12 of The Grace for breakfast podcast today. I’m covering lots of good topics with my guest Jamie Michelle and we recorded this episode a couple months ago now and then just a couple weeks ago. I was on her live radio show. Yes. She has a live radio show which is really cool and exciting.
And her show is called permission to thrive. So we have been spending lots of time together lately and but in this podcast episode we talked about how she went from disordered eating and body dysmorphia to being the award-winning body image Coach T is today, so she went from the ground up and now she’s this thriving woman and she even got to a point where she had to completely start her life all over and rebuild it back up.
So she is. Inspiration we get into so many topics like how to acknowledge and make peace with where you’re at so that you can take the steps forward that you need to and how we can identify what we truly believe about ourselves so that we begin to shift our perspectives and even how we can shift from negative feelings into positive ones throughout our day to day so she shares some really really good golden nuggets.
This episode is packed with Insight. So tune in. For this episode of Grace for breakfast.
Jamie: [00:01:22] Are
Iviana: [00:01:24] you ready to stop feeling like you’re failing at everything want to stop picking yourself up out of burnout over and over again. Do you feel like it’s just impossible to reach your goals and be a good mom at the same time.
Well, it’s all good because we’re in this together now, it’s about time you treat yourself to a much-needed break. Grab some coffee and get ready to take a little bite of Grace for
Jamie: [00:01:53] breakfast.
Welcome to the grace for
Iviana: [00:02:08] breakfast podcast. I’m here again with another interview. And today I’m with Jamie Michelle. Welcome
Jamie: [00:02:14] Jamie. Hey every Onna, how are you? I’m
Iviana: [00:02:18] so happy. I’m so happy that you’re here. So Jamie Michelle is a CEO and founder of Jamie Shelley LLC and she’s been in the health and fitness industry for nearly 10 years.
She helps women who are in search for a solution to their struggle with their body their weight and food, and she’s also an award-winning body. Image coach 2019 top body image Coach of the Year through the International Association of top professionals
Jamie: [00:02:43] and she’s also so
Iviana: [00:02:44] passionate about guiding women to release limiting beliefs and create new thought patterns that are in alignment with who they really are at their
Jamie: [00:02:52] core.
Iviana: [00:02:53] Welcome.
Jamie: [00:02:54] Thank you so much. I’m so happy to be here. Thank you for having me.
Iviana: [00:02:58] Yes. I’m so glad that you’re here. So before we were talking here, and we started to hit record. We just got right in. You the conversation about comparison and before we dig in I really would love to know or share with our audience.
Just
Jamie: [00:03:13] your transformation
Iviana: [00:03:15] Story. How did you get to where you are today that you’re now someone who’s helping people with such a really
Jamie: [00:03:20] tough topic. Yeah, so that’s such a beautiful question and also so important that you know my audience and everyone else’s audience knows that. Whatever pain they’re feeling I felt it.
So how I got to where I am. Now in terms of you know, the award-winning body image coach like I don’t even know how that happened, but I had to go through so much pain and so much struggle in terms of my own body dysmorphia my own Eating Disorders long story short I was. Battling anorexia for nearly seven years.
So I had gotten like addicted to losing weight after college and I that was like my way of meeting my need for certainty. Like I knew that I was going to be controlling my food that day and it was a very hectic time in my life and and I continued on like I put so much of my my entire self-worth. My entire image was in the number on the scale like that was if it was in a certain thing if it wasn’t exactly where I wanted it to be.
It was like one tenth of a pound above it rules how my day was going to go it was you know, I was miserable. I was I was searching for my happiness and for my validation through being small Through Being Fit and my body went through so much stress because I was also addicted to exercise so Not only was I starving my body but I was exercising for over 6 hours a day some days and when I say that it’s not like I was like going for a light jog like I was brushing my.
Body into the ground for like six crazy hours a day sometimes even longer and I used it as like my excuse or my story was that you know, it’s how I it’s how I process my stress, right? That was like my my thing, but what ended up happening was after those chronic years. I went through some emotional trauma as well and something happens to me in 2016.
I was living in Fort Lauderdale at the time that. It was a very traumatic emotionally traumatic experience for me and it was like the straw that broke the camel’s back. So my body had been under so much stress for so long and this horrible thing happened to me and it was like my body went into total panic and survival mode, which it was already in survival mode.
And what happened was I started rapidly gaining weight and I didn’t know what was happening because I’ve been in the health and fitness industry for a long time. I’m a. And I’m a nutritionist and I didn’t know like why was my body, you know storing all this that when I was still doing everything the same like nothing had changed and I ended up gaining 60 pounds and less than three months.
Oh my goodness. Yeah. So something was very very wrong and what ended up happening like it was so that in and of itself was traumatic for me. I felt like I had lost everything because of member my identity was wrapped up in that number on the scale. So I felt like I lost who I was. As I felt like I couldn’t do my job because if I’m not fit if I’m not saying I had this story that no one’s going to want to hire me to help coach them.
Right? And so I like literally lost my will to live at one point. I did and then God steps in at that dark hour and I just heard that soft whisper, you know, this is not the end for you. Just keep going like there’s a light and I didn’t know what that meant, but I listened and after going through everything and now I look back like I.
To learn and teach myself that it’s not about the food. It’s not about what you eat because I was trying so hard to lose that 60 pounds by still manipulating my body still forcing myself to exercise for ridiculous hours of the day and eating so little and I was still gaining weight and I had this like come to God kind of moment after I was battling this weight gain for like two years almost two years.
It was coming up on two years and I couldn’t get it off and I. I had this coming to God moment where I was like, you know what I have not been living my life. Like I’ve been waiting until I lose this weight to like start my life again, and it’s happening around me and I’m not I’m not a part of it and I’m miserable.
So I’m either going to and I can’t obviously what I’m doing now is not working like my body is not responding. It’s clearly just going to be what it is. No matter what I do. So I may as well, you know, let go of control and except where I am and learn how to live my life in. This body if that’s what I’m supposed to be.
I realized that I had no control over anything and the minutes literally like the moment that I let go and I like announced it to the world. I remember distinctly I was like not that day but a few months later I finally was like, okay. I’m going to like admit to the world that you know, I’m not.
I’m not you know, a hundred and five pounds anymore at because I had been hiding and wow. Yeah, I’ve been hiding I literally didn’t leave my house. Like when I say I wasn’t living my life like I was not so I had that realization. I was like, you know. It’s people are people’s lives are like going on in mind is going on, but I’m not I’m not a part of it and I’m not enjoying it and if my body wants to be this size, I better learn how to live in it or else.
I’m going to miss out on so much more and I had already missed out on so many things because of my Eating Disorders because of my self-image being so poor and so the moment that I made that decision to just be and stop trying to control everything and just try. Then and surrender I had to surrender.
Yeah, my body melt like the the way it melted away. It was unbelievable.
Iviana: [00:08:54] It was mental, but then it happened physically to
Jamie: [00:08:57] it was it was it was all like emotional pain. It was all and I had to work through a lot of stuff. It was like. All of this kind of happened and it snowballed from the same moment because after I had that horrible thought of like not wanting to live my life anymore.
Obviously, I sought help so I went to a mental health professional and it took a couple, you know, you have to kind of like dat around and find the right ones and and I didn’t find the right one until until this time. So it was it all happened at once and and she was like straight first session within 10 minutes you have PTSD.
Like I was like, how can you make that diagnosis when you’ve only known me for 10 minutes we have barely but I was like crying like I couldn’t even talk about what had happened without like bawling my I couldn’t even think about it. Right. Are
Iviana: [00:09:47] you able to share a little bit
about
Iviana: [00:09:49] you went
Jamie: [00:09:50] through?
Sure. Yeah. So it was it was completely an emotional trauma and I manifested it into my experience meaning. Well, I had such poor self-esteem and I. Add on other people to validate my existence, right my self-worth and it was all tied in my appearance and I was constantly telling myself all of these horrible things in my head.
Like you’re obviously like you’re not good enough. You’re not worthy. You’re never going to be loved. No one’s ever gonna love you. You’re only you’re only worth loving if you’re small like I had all these beliefs in my head and if I’m not perfect no one’s going to want me right. I’m damaged goods.
I’m broken. You know, I’m not. Just like this constant cycle of fears and doubts and I was so hard on myself no such a perfectionist and and I never really let myself like be happy like I was never happy and what had ended up happening. It was like it was like have you ever I’m sure some of the listeners can relate to this.
Have you ever dated the same guy over and over and over again just in like a different person. Oh wait avianna. I lost your sounds. Oh, there you are.
Iviana: [00:11:02] Okay, I’m using myself because the
Jamie: [00:11:05] oh, okay, but
Iviana: [00:11:07] yes, I have dated the same guy over and over again. And for me it was definitely related to you know, kind of what I learned as a child and different trauma that I had as a child.
So it’s interesting that you say that because we you know, we have these thought patterns or maybe a trauma that that triggered something in us that causes us to react the same fact way over and over
Jamie: [00:11:27] again. Yes. Our programs what when were kids right? We’re programs and of the way life works and in our perception of how love is and what how people are and how the World Turns really how life.
Unfolds when we’re kids and it’s subconscious, right and our parents don’t mean to do it. But it’s the way we perceive things when we’re little and then we think okay. Well, this is how love is supposed to be? Yes, and what had ended up happening. It wasn’t my parents that I got this example from but it was my thoughts about myself that ended up attracting so.
I was treating myself horribly. I didn’t I didn’t love myself. I didn’t have any sense of confidence or self-worth which is why I’m an if I had the eating disorder, right and it’s all connected. Yeah, and every guy I attracted into my life like whether I knew it or not was either already involved with somebody and I didn’t know or he ended up cheating on me or it was just like purely sexual physical know like commitment right?
So in my mind I was like, Now, I’m not good enough to be the the only woman or I’m not good enough to be loved the way that I want to be loved like I don’t deserve that kind of love. And so all of these men I kept having the same experience over and over and over again of just being left or just being like finding out that they cheated on me or finding out that you know, there were more women involved or whatever and this last one in Fort Lauderdale.
Was it wasn’t the person but it was the the repetition of everything that my body had been through up until that point. So so I don’t know if I’ve actually ever shared this this whole story. So this is exciting. So what and I might have done it on one podcast of mine, but. What ended up happening was I was like so head over heels in love with this guy and I thought he was and I thought he was the end-all-be-all whatever it was.
But again, he was he it was on again off again, and he would be either so great to me or so awful to me. So horribly awful to me and at a party it was over Memorial Day weekend in 2016. We were no longer involved. He was dating another girl at this time. And so we were all at this barbecue and he was there with her and it was fine.
I was okay with it. I remember actually feeling so good about myself that day which was rare. It’s very rare that I felt good, but I did not there. Yeah, and the whole day went fine until the night have the because it was like a BBQ dragon has a right and there had been some drinking going on but.
Long story short he ended up like reaching up my dress and grabbing my ass, which would have been okay, if we were still in that place right yet. His girlfriend was right there. He was and she had to have seen it too. But I just I remember that happening and I turned around and I looked at him and I said, you know, don’t touch me like that anymore.
You don’t have permission and this kind of this guy has never really been told no. Because he’s you know, he’s very handsome. He’s very Charming. He says all the right things and and he’s a very smooth but he usually can’t like no woman. I don’t know if anyone has ever told ever experienced rejection when I said that it was like a flip switched in him and he berated me.
So no one at this party had seen what had just happened and had her because I said it low. I was like, you know, don’t touch I was quiet g flat. And screams it was like the kind of thing that would happen in a movie where like the the DJ’s like playing the music and then this thing happened and it goes on and like stops and Everyone likes tears started screaming at me all of those fears that I had in my head.
You’re the worst person I’ve ever met. No one’s ever going to love you. You’re disgusting. You’re worthless. You’re never going to amount to anything, you know, all these things like who would ever want you literally speaking out loud. And not just seeing them screaming them so that everyone at this party like hers and it would do I was so in shock at that moment that I just stood there like my mouth was gaping wide open and I just remember being like how did this just happen?
And that’s not even the worst of it. There’s more to the story that. Ended up happening later and the whole thing got twisted and turned on me start like wanting to be the purse. Like there was a it’s basically like tarnish my reputation and I had nothing to do with it. I just wanted to understand why he treated me like such a piece of shit, right?
Like what is it about me? You don’t treat anyone else like that? Why is it sometimes that you’re just such a horrible person to me? I don’t understand and we ended up having a conversation later that night and. Somehow the story got flipped onto me saying that I waited for his girlfriend to leave to like make a move on him.
And then yeah and everyone believed that and I was like, oh my God and even my best friend believed it and so the trauma that I felt was not only like all of my fears is being literally like verbally said outs me and like like being proven true, but my reputation was tarnished, right? My status was gone and then.
Thing else kind of like crumbled from there. I ended up I lived in Fort Lauderdale at the time. I had some move home shortly after because it was just I couldn’t live there anymore. I had become such a toxic environment. So that was the that was the trauma and and there had been so much. So many situations that were so similar to that that I had experienced like prior to so it wasn’t necessarily the guy that that like I don’t even want to give him that level of like, yeah.
It was
Iviana: [00:17:21] like a combination of
Jamie: [00:17:23] it
Iviana: [00:17:23] would you say that was like the lowest point was did you see that’s one like the climax? And then that started to shift.
Jamie: [00:17:31] Yeah. So after that happens everything like my body started it started gaining weight slowly and I just I I was like my world and my life like stopped and I didn’t really know like how to pick the pieces up like because here’s the worst part about it is I had such a low self-esteem that even after that happened I still.
Would have gotten with that guy if he would have wanted to you know what I mean?
Iviana: [00:18:00] Oh, I do I was I was that girl.
Jamie: [00:18:03] Yeah, and and it was so painful because in my logical brain, I knew that I deserved better. Hmm. It was fierce come in and you’re like well. I think these things and if like you think that if that’s the kind of love you deserve that that’s not love, right?
Mmm. So after that it happens, you know II lived there all the way through so this happened May because it was a memorial day. So end of May. And I lived there all the way through December and I moved back to Pittsburgh and January of the following year. So I was only in Fort Lauderdale for a year, but it was by far the darkest year 2016 and 2017 where the darkest years of my life.
So after that happens, you know, I struggled to really like figure out like, okay, how do I move forward and then. I knew that I had to leave because there was no way that that environment was ever going to be healthy for me again. So I moved back to Pittsburgh but that was like admitting defeat to me.
That was like, oh my God. Yeah because I wanted to start my business down in Florida. Like I wanted that to be my future because I am such a beach person like my soul my soul my spirit lives at the beach. I know that’s where I meant to live and and I so wanted this thing to work out and when it doesn’t play out the way that we want to we are so.
To an outcome that when it doesn’t happen it like crushes our entire reality and that’s exactly what happened. So when I had to move home, I still had a home here. I thank goodness, but I felt like everything about me was just like devalue validated. Like I lost my future in my eyes. I lost a potential relationship in my eyes.
I lost my body which was my identity. So I had no sense of purpose. I felt like I couldn’t do my job. Because I was no longer, you know, the fit like model that I wanted to be in and it was just like this downward spiral. So when I moved home, I wouldn’t let anyone see me. Like I literally wouldn’t let I didn’t even tell people that I was home.
Actually. How
Iviana: [00:20:07] did you feel at that point when you were there? Like what was
Jamie: [00:20:09] going through your head at that time – the only focus that I had was I have to lose this weight. I have to lose this weight and and I could not stop. I don’t know if you know what PTSD is like, I’m sure some listeners do and and probably anyone can really relate to this who’s ever gone through something.
That’s because we all have stress and Trauma in our bodies. It doesn’t matter how big or small to us. We metabolized it as trauma
Iviana: [00:20:37] and doesn’t I have to pause. It doesn’t matter how you you know, sometimes people think that trauma has to be like, I don’t know something intense like rape or
Jamie: [00:20:45] just something that’s like
Iviana: [00:20:47] gory and it’s all relative to the persons.
Variance and the reason why I say that is because I remember when I first met you you shared a
Jamie: [00:20:54] story about your
Iviana: [00:20:54] upbringing it was actually like
Jamie: [00:20:56] yeah
Iviana: [00:20:57] would say is like with someone would wish for as far as your upgrade bringing goes, you know, like monetarily
Jamie: [00:21:03] but you still
Iviana: [00:21:04] had. So much that you suffered because of I mean because of that we’re dealing with in your experience.
Jamie: [00:21:11] Yeah, it’s all how we perceive it and and what we feel in our bodies and what’s true for us, right? So you can’t like do you validate or invalidate your feelings? Right? And and you’re right. I this is something I always say to my clients is like, you know, we. We associate PTSD with like you said being raped or being in the military and seeing awful things or being in a horrible car accident or something like extremely dramatic, but what people don’t realize is it can be a cumulative effect of all of these little teeny tiny events that we metabolize as trauma in our body
Iviana: [00:21:47] isn’t that validates our fears to?
Jamie: [00:21:49] Yeah, and and it gets stored there it gets distorted and we have to be able to process it and like relearn that we are actually safe. But when you when you’re in that space and I didn’t know I had PTSD until like a year and a half later. So every single thought that I had was like replaying that whole scenario over and over and over in my head.
It was like a cycle and every day was the same like wake up workout. Come home take a shower put new workout clothes on and I was still finishing my degree at this time. And I was like, you know researching every freaking diet under the sun and trying so hard. I like I thought I had a hormonal issue.
I can’t tell you how many doctors I went to to figure out why I was gaining all this weight and and I will say the one thing that they all kept telling me as your cortisol is off the freaking charts. Like I can’t even tell you what it is because it literally like was spiking off the charts like so high and I was like, well where
Iviana: [00:22:45] does all levels don’t they go up?
Jamie: [00:22:47] It’s your stress. That’s a stress hormone. So it makes so much sense and and wet cortisol is a fat storing hormone. So that was my body’s response like getting back to the whole body thing. Like the reason why I gained all that weight because because my body was just trying to keep me alive. It will it knew was that I was in serious danger because
Iviana: [00:23:09] I’m so hard.
Jamie: [00:23:10] Yeah, and I had starved it for so long and it was like, okay when that happens all it new was to go into fight or flight mode like it was in pure survival mode and all it new was to okay. I’m just going to store every single thing. I eat as fat because right now it’s just like a famine like I’m not you know, I yeah, and so
Iviana: [00:23:31] I’m like so fascinated,
Jamie: [00:23:33] isn’t it crate?
I mean. Now I go I go back in that and I can honestly say it nice say this to clients to because I know how painful it is to like hate your body. I know what it feels like to wake up every day and step on the scale and cry and like not be able to think about anything else and like constantly like poking and prodding yourself in the mirror and like wishing you were somebody else and comparing yourself to other people like we were talking about.
It’s just it’s so painful. And when I like I can look back and literally every experience that I thank God for it. I thank God for all of that because if it weren’t for all of that, like it all makes so much sense. They all say like every they all say whoever they are, right, but, you know people tell you you’ll be able to look back one day and you’ll like see the clear path that you had to take to get to where you are and it couldn’t be more true.
So
Iviana: [00:24:28] and and.
Jamie: [00:24:29] Oh wait, there’s like do you hear that? There’s Thunder. That’s why all my
Iviana: [00:24:33] stuff. Don’t worry about it. Okay.
Jamie: [00:24:36] So yeah, it’s you get to this place where you you look back and you’re like, holy crap. Like it all makes so like it’s so clear as to why
Iviana: [00:24:46] it’s like it was already, you know,
Jamie: [00:24:48] I was predestined.
Iviana: [00:24:49] Yes. That’s what I was gonna say and I was gonna say also is that. When you go through certain things, I mean you went through serious pain like I would say that what you were going through is very extreme as far as that because for me something that I haven’t I don’t really share with many
Jamie: [00:25:05] people but
Iviana: [00:25:06] for me the struggle began when I had kids it’s like my body changed.
I always was
naturally
Jamie: [00:25:11] petite
Iviana: [00:25:11] but then you know, I had kids and after my second one, it’s it was just a constant struggle of just losing maybe 10 15 pounds, but the way that I did it was I just didn’t go. On the scale, I would just in the mirror and I’m like, I don’t like what I
Jamie: [00:25:26] see so and so different I went through that too.
I mean, I got to a point where I was like, you know what I’m doing. I’m not even gonna like use this anymore because I just know that I’m gonna hate what I see and it’s gonna ruin my whole day. So it was like little by little, you know, I had to break up with the scale and and the whole thing that I had to relearn was, you know, I had the hardest thing I was so attached to my food rolls.
I was so attached to dieting and too. Only eating like clean Foods right and and being so careful and staying under, you know, 1200 calories and whoever made that up needs to like I hope they’re rotting in hell. Not really. I don’t I don’t wish that on anyone, but honestly, I recently heard
Iviana: [00:26:08] that that’s like
Jamie: [00:26:08] bogus for it’s for a toddler like a toddler’s body needs 1200 calories.
It’s ridiculous that we would ever tell an adult woman that that’s all she should eat it absolutely insanity. But anyways getting back to the point like I had. Learn that. I didn’t I couldn’t I was using those tools as like my crutch and like I wasn’t fully trusting my body yet. So the heart one of the hardest things for me to do and it took me a long time.
Like I was deleting them from my phone and I had a lot of calorie tracking apps and a lot of movement tracking outs and I had to break up with my I watch for quite some time because I was so attached to how many calories I had Burns in the day, right? So there were all these like little things that I was so addicted to and it’s the minute that I like dropped all of it.
And I was just like, you know what I’m just going to live. I’m not going to be like in this prison of diet culture anymore, which is what it is. It’s a prison and we’re taught by ISIS like if you’re listening to this and you can relate to any of this which I know most women can relate to like not accepting their bodies on some level right?
Like there’s always something about ourselves that we want to change. Yes, but we’re conditioned that way. It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault and. It’s not the truth. So we are taught to literally not trust and listen to our bodies based on what Society tells us because we see diets everywhere and we think that that’s how we have to do these things to be healthy and that’s just simply not the case.
Our body knows how to do this for us. I bought you don’t need a detox. You don’t need to control your food because your body is built to do that for you. And if you would just connect to it and if we would just understand what it’s communicating to us because it’s always sending us messages. Yes. I takes our messages when we’re tired.
It’s a message when we get sick stomach aches like any physical Sensation that we have in our body. That’s our body trying to tell us, you know, something’s up and my weight gain was my body being like yo. There is something seriously wrong here. You need to start paying attention to me and I had been so disconnected from it for so long that I just stopped.
I wasn’t I was like shut up. Shut up. I’m gonna figure this out on like through my brain and we think we can figure it out and get help your way out of it. And that’s your way out of it. But that’s not it’s about learning how to be with yourself and accepting yourself. And and when I say accepting it doesn’t mean you have to love it right A lot of people confuse having to accept where you are because because we.
At transform we cannot heal our bodies and transform our bodies in our lives the way we really want to unless we have total acceptance. We have to just simply acknowledge and be aware and like except that this is where we are right now and if we can’t see that if we avoid it like the plague if we push it away and pretend it’s not there and sweep it under the rug.
We’re rejecting it right we’re resisting what’s actually true and we’re tasting. For this other thing that we think is going to make us happy that we think is going to give us that validation and fulfill the internal love that we actually can give to ourselves. We think that that is what’s going to do it for us.
That’s like the magic thing and other diets going to get me there whatever and and and a lot of people confuse total acceptance with like giving in like well wait Jamie if I accept myself now, that means that I’m not going to be motivated to change. No couldn’t be more wrong because when you accept where you are and you see where you are.
Able to say okay. I know what’s best for me and while I’m this right now, this is not my best. I know that there’s something better for me. So I’m here and I’m okay with where I am. I don’t have to love it. I can have total acceptance with where I am. Now while wanting to change the way I love her change the my body and be like in a healthier lighter frame and walk the earth on a lighter frame that’s perfectly fine, but we can’t pretend like what’s happening now is not real.
Yeah, I mean we can’t hit. I
Iviana: [00:30:09] mean I have so many things to like to add to but one thing that really stood out to me when you were talking about rejecting like rejecting really it almost just takes you down the wrong path, you know,
Jamie: [00:30:19] always
Iviana: [00:30:20] he it takes you down the wrong path and going back to the second episode of this podcast and I was talking about for me.
The definition of Grace at this point in my life is really just the ultimate release and shared something. So beautiful that it was just saying like when you are accepting, you know, And for me that’s like another form of release
Jamie: [00:30:38] just like letting go surrender. Yeah
Iviana: [00:30:40] that surrender. It’s not giving up.
It’s like moving through, you
Jamie: [00:30:44] know – absolutely. Yeah, that’s exactly right. And I love how you put that it’s it’s moving through it and always knowing that there’s something better like you are where you are right now for a reason. It’s it goes back to like what I was sharing about my story like there is always a purpose for every single thing and and those hard moments in our lives.
Actually the moments where we grow the most Haines is our Catalyst for growth and if we don’t allow ourselves to feel that pain and it all comes down to work that I do with my clients. It’s not physical, right? We think it’s about the body. We think we think all it is is we have an addiction to food or we have problems with food and we want to just stop binge eating or whatever it is.
But that’s just a symptom. Mhm you’re engaging in that activity or binge eating because there’s an emotion in your body that you don’t. Feel and so you’re numbing out your stuffing it down with food or you’re distracting yourself with it or whatever. It might be and you’re trying to get that feeling that you want to feel through the food.
Hmm. But what I mean don’t we can give that feeling to ourselves? We just have to learn what our bodies communicating to us and and knowing that emotion. Are just emotions It’s Just Energy. It doesn’t Define who we are and then that were like any less of a good person. And and I think that’s the problem.
A lot of people make is you know, if I feel stressed or if I feel overwhelmed or if I feel anxiety or depression like that means that I’m a bad person like we have these stories associated with their unconscious again, it’s all I’m conscious thought but those thoughts are what lead us to feel those awful things and when we have shitty thoughts we’re going to have a shitty.
All one thing so if we know that then we can always go back to okay. What am I thinking right now and what am I believing to be true right now for this to be happening to me? And what is the belief that I need to get to the outcome that I actually want to have it’s all about figuring out how we want to feel and taking personal responsibility for our emotionality and and our energy that’s all what it comes down to it has nothing to do with our bodies.
Iviana: [00:32:51] So let’s pause and go back and repeat
Jamie: [00:32:54] it.
Iviana: [00:32:55] Thinking about how we want to feel.
Jamie: [00:32:57] Yeah,
Iviana: [00:32:58] you can get those thoughts in your head right? It’s going to come it’s inevitable,
Jamie: [00:33:03] but
Iviana: [00:33:04] don’t hold onto them. Don’t let them repeat in your mind. Move them into how you want to feel.
Jamie: [00:33:09] Yeah. So that is one of the biggest things that I work with my clients on because the thoughts that were thinking first of all we can have like so many thoughts at once our brains are just always working there always there’s always something going through our minds and we’re so used to living in a place of like not being present and not in our bodies and we have no clue really what we’re thinking because it’s so much is happening and we’re and we’re hustling and we’re rushing and we’re doing all these things.
Eggs, and and we’re living in an era where it’s like the busier you are. It’s like a badge of honor right now. I’m just so busy. I have so many going on and and oh, I don’t have time for myself and blah blah blah blah blah. It’s just bullshit. It’s an excuse. Yeah bold to not feel their emotions and and not look at what’s actually going on.
So one thing that I work with my clients on so much as learning how to really get present and just notice like what am I thinking right now for like 30 seconds put a timer on or one? And to set get quiet got still and like see what comes across your mind and you’ll see how freaking ridiculous some of the thoughts are and those are the ones that are on repeat 24 hours a day 7 days a week and their programming you to behave the way you are know what you have to do then is we get to ask ourselves.
Okay, is that thought true if this thing happens, is that really going to mean I’m gonna die. Probably not. Like we think these awful things are like if this happens then that person is not going to love me or blah blah blah like we have so many things that are just like absolutely ludicrous and if we say them out loud to ourselves we can be like, okay.
Wow that I can’t believe that that is what I’m thinking right now and it’s just like so obvious but we live in a world where we don’t pay attention to that kind of stuff right? We’re just like on autopilot and so relearning how to do that and then here’s another thing that. So many it’s so funny when I ask my clients, like what what is it that you want?
What do you want? They don’t have an answer. They don’t know because they spend so much time focusing on what they don’t want they know so vividly and so clearly like I don’t want this thing, but you’re focusing so much on trying to not make that thing happen that it’s what ends up happening because that’s what we focus on expands the more we think about one thing and we’re like, oh I really I’m just doing this.
So this thing doesn’t happen like put try to push. Way and and it ends up happening and we have no clue. What the heck we even really want. So figuring out OK, what is the life that I want if I could have my best ideal life? Who would I be? Who do I have to be to have that and how do I what is the feeling that’s going to get me there and then embodying that feeling because at the end of the day, all we want is to feel loved nasty.
Here’s the beautiful thing. We are beings of light and love that’s what we’re made out of so we think we have to like hustle for are worth and and an urn love from other people. But we don’t have to work for something that were made out of right we have it we have access to it because we are it and that’s a concept that people are like wait.
I don’t get it and and it’s okay if you don’t get it right now because it’s a foreign concept to you. You just your body knows how to do this. You just have to wake it up. We have to remind it. We’d have to show it. That we do trust it and start reconnecting to it and then relearning how to feel and and that’s what it’s all about.
And so many people have such a hard time with like anxiety and I truly believe that that’s why there’s so many mental health problems in the world today is because we’re literally taught to like stuff down our emotions and at pain gets its it gets sword in the bodies and it gets passed down from generation.
So like our parents felt pain our grandparents felt pain and they didn’t deal with it. Now we are born with it and it’s our responsibility to heal it. Yeah. Yeah.
Iviana: [00:37:00] One thing that came to me is the fact that oftentimes those of us who are able to show our emotions or share them. It’s considered a weakness.
It’s not considered a strength and I just think you know for me as a mom. I’m constantly drawing my kids like yes talk to me tell me what’s going on. Don’t hold it in, you know, because even myself I find myself, you know, one of my kids they know I kid. They know
Jamie: [00:37:27] pick up an energy. Oh my gosh, you feel energy.
Iviana: [00:37:29] I’m sensitive and oftentimes, they’ll be like Mom what’s wrong and I default to oh nothing. I’m good, and they’re like.
Jamie: [00:37:37] Are
Iviana: [00:37:37] you sure and then now? I’ve been like oh my gosh. No, I don’t want to teach you that actually mommy is not feeling very good beautiful.
Jamie: [00:37:46] That’s so beautiful. Because now you’re teaching them that it’s okay to admit that when you’re not having your best day and that’s one thing that I always try to do with my audience is.
Not every day is going to be a great body image day. Like here. Here’s the thing that a lot of people I have this misconception, like once you heal your body and you get to a place where you are like good with yourself. It doesn’t mean that those thoughts go away.
Iviana: [00:38:08] You never arrived like we were in love.
We’re never going to arrive
Jamie: [00:38:11] arrive and there are going to be days where you like don’t feel that great about ourselves and and those thoughts creep back in and all we have to do is like be aware of like, okay, this is certain. He’s something what’s going on that I’m not paying attention to and what.
I need to allow to emerge from me right now so that I can move forward and move through it. Like you said like that was so beautiful because Feeling Again is the way to healing and we’re so afraid to feel we’re so afraid to feel and I love what you said like it should we see? Brene, Brown talks all about like vulnerability and and the way people perceive vulnerable being I do too as being like a weakness but it’s so opposite vulnerability is how we show up as being brave.
Like we can’t be courageous if we don’t have if we aren’t willing to be vulnerable. It takes a great deal of courage to share when our heart is breaking and keeping it open at the same time like it’s just in and and that’s where I met my goal in mind my vision for the world. Us to just get everyone to that place where they know like whatever they’re feeling is okay that you always have access to and I should say and we always have access to love at the same time.
You can have a heartbreaking and still be able to feel love. Why because you are loved. Mmm-hmm. It’s possible to balance the two like I have moments where I’m so overwhelmed and that, you know running your own business is stressful. It’s stressful and it’s so easy and got wrapped up and not like.
Solon Grind Mode hmm and overwhelmed by that stress and if we can just have the awareness of being like, okay, I’m feeling this right now. Let me bring love into it. Let me remind myself who I really am and just get still we can then focus on that love and level always overpower whatever else it is that we’re feeling because again, first of all, what we focus on expands second of all love is the highest vibration most powerful emotion.
So that is going to overpower any lower vibrating emotion like anger frustration. Station depression anxiety all the things so can you give us
Iviana: [00:40:15] a really practical tool? And I really want to get into comparison but can you get the crab practical tool of when we’re in that place
Jamie: [00:40:23] that we’re just in low Vibes?
Like
Iviana: [00:40:25] low low low. What what is
Jamie: [00:40:27] what’s something that you share with people
Iviana: [00:40:29] that they should do to get themselves
Jamie: [00:40:30] into that new place. Yeah, so this is such a beautiful question. So when oh gosh, it’s difficult when you don’t have any experience and you don’t trust your body. So the very first thing and it’s so interesting.
I was literally just writing a guide on this for my clients. We have to feel safe enough. To feel into our bodies and to be like, okay what is here, but we can’t do any of this work. We can’t transform we can’t be able to like stop in and be like, okay what’s going through my head unless we have presents.
It has to be able to be in the moment fully because without being aware. There’s no way like we can either be in a state of observation which is where we want to be but when we don’t have the awareness to know like whether that like we get me when we feel an emotion, we try so hard not to feel it that we become identified with it and then it overtakes our experience because we can’t see the space between the emotion and.
We become the emotion. So when we are starting to feel that sensation creep in like we all know what stress feels like, we all know what anxiety feels like, right and something comes in and our brain automatically is like, oh my God, this is that I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die and we try to fight it off and then we’re all of a sudden were like so identified with it and and all we know and that moment is.
I’m anxious. I’m anxious. I’m anxious and you’re identifying as anxiety or you’re identifying as stress. I’m stressed. I’m stressed. I’m stressed. No, you are a being you’re a person who is experiencing the sensation of anxiety or of stress or of overwhelm. So don’t let that Sensation that emotion overtake your experience.
That’s the difference between having a bout of depression and letting it take you out for a weeks or months old. Letting yourself feel the sadness feel the Heartbreak and being able to move on like I can go from complete and like utter heartbreak to like laughing and joy within like an hour, you know now whereas before those depressed moments would last like month of consuming that and we can’t do that again, like being present and and how to learn how to be present is just using all five of your senses like get so in the moment when your present it’s.
Possible to overeat it’s impossible to be bored. It’s impossible to because there’s so much going around you like. What do you smell? What’s the smell? What are you hearing? What are you tasting in your mouth? What are you seeing with your eyes? What does the chair feel like under you? How does your body feel like there are so many things going around on that.
You’re like, so in the moment that you’re taken out of your head and you’re able to like be in your body me like, okay. This is what it feels like and and then you’re able to fully enjoy what’s actually happening in that moment. And then you can have the separation again between who you really are which is light and love and the emotions that you’re feeling it because they don’t Define.
That’s not who you are and it’s such a beautiful moment when you can allow that space and the minute you see the difference like okay, I’m feeling this right now. What is it here to teach me instead of being like Oh my God. I’m having an anxiety attack. I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die like no, you’re not you’re not going to die.
Iviana: [00:43:50] I love that. Oh my goodness. So I’m going to just translate it into my own layman’s
Jamie: [00:43:54] term. Yeah.
Iviana: [00:43:55] What I’m getting from you is you know for me one of the biggest trigger words or thoughts was. I’m overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed
Jamie: [00:44:02] right
Iviana: [00:44:03] but it’s a matter of a mindset shift. And it’s from going from I am this feeling to I am a human being experiencing that emotion.
It’s just that
Jamie: [00:44:15] and
Iviana: [00:44:15] that is a result. It’s like it’s a it’s a side effect of whatever else is going on.
Jamie: [00:44:20] Yeah. All emotions are is energy and our body is the vessel or the vehicle that is is the home of these emotions. So if we know that that’s all our body is like it’s the home for these energies to like.
Expressed and be processed and that’s all it is and we have to let it pass through and and it’s a beautiful thing when we’re able to identify like, okay. This is here. It’s always there to teach us something like what is this here to teach me? What am I doing right now that’s keeping the the that I’m out of alignment like what it because when we feel those things it’s because we’re doing things that aren’t aligned with our truth with our higher self or with whatever we believe so it all comes back like you were saying like, It’s a mindset but it’s one step further.
So every emotion does come from a thought and that’s come from our beliefs. So identifying what we’re truly believing about ourselves. What is the true belief a lot of us have that worthiness belief like I am unworthy. I don’t deserve to be happy. If I don’t I like I’m not loved I’m not worthy of being loved.
If I don’t do this, then I won’t get loud or whatever. It might be. But they’re unconscious again and we have to have that awareness be able to go like okay if I’m feeling this overwhelm right now like you were saying what is it that I’m believing to be true for me to be experiencing the sensation right now.
Hmm, where am I out of alignment? What am I doing? That’s that’s not serving me. And and then how can I shift that to get back into my truth and and and and never again, it’s not about doing it’s not about thinking it’s just about being who we really. Our which at the end of the day is light and love and it sounds so simple and I know if you’re listening and you’re like, oh this is so frustrating because you’re making it sound like it’s just so easy its it is but it isn’t because we have to have that willingness because so many professional professional so many personal development coaches or are people in this industry make it seem like all it is is light and love and like rainbows and butterflies and.
So much of healing is pain like we have to be able to and be willing to feel that pain and and to do that without being like taken out by it because because subconsciously our brain thinks if we go there if we go back to that Cham if we steal it if we feel. It’s going to be so overwhelming and it’s going to take us out.
We’re going to die. That’s the fear that our subconscious has but it’s not it’s not going to happen. Our body never gives us any more than what we can handle and it’s always giving us exactly what we need in that moment. So we have to establish that connection of trust with our bodies. And know that okay, every emotion is here.
Everything that I’m feeling is for a reason. What is the lesson and how can I again like you said move through it and become the highest best most authentic version of myself and get to a get to where I really want to go and people don’t talk about the pain. You don’t people don’t talk about it’s like a grieving process be called because all those parts of you are dying away more severe are screwing you anymore, but they were you right so there.
It is like there are days that you are like kind of vibrating a little bit lower, you know, and and you have to be okay with that and know that if your body is safe and that it’s just this too was just going to pass through just pass through just be with it without trying to change it knowing that you are loved and that this is only getting closer to where you want to go.
Yeah, that’s what I
Iviana: [00:47:52] was going to say was like what I share with my clients about
Jamie: [00:47:55] imagine yourself like an onion
Iviana: [00:47:57] like there’s tons of layers.
Jamie: [00:47:59] So
Iviana: [00:47:59] and you know, like we said earlier you we think oh one day we’re going to arrive and we see all these
Jamie: [00:48:05] people out in the world that are just like, oh they’re
Iviana: [00:48:07] doing so great.
They’ve arrived and the reality. Is that a we’re not going to arrive be there’s so many like things to shed and little by little and that’s exactly I agree with you completely and what you say that. I can’t reword it exactly how you said
Jamie: [00:48:25] it. But
Iviana: [00:48:26] you’re going to deal with right now exactly what you need to be dealing with
Jamie: [00:48:29] right now.
Everything is happening in perfect timing. Yeah, it’s happening for you life does not happen to you doesn’t happen to us. It’s happening for us to take us where we’re supposed to go. We have to trust that and it’s so great that this is all about Great Taste because we are so supported we are so guided and so loved by God we have to trust.
He’s never going to put anything in our way that we can’t handle. So it’s about trusting our body is it’s about trusting our truest selves and knowing that if we do wherever like if we go where he leads us like he’s going to bring us through we’re not in this alone. We’re in its there’s so much that’s happening around us that we can’t even see with our eyes, but we’re all energy all of this is energy and it comes down to energy and and that’s one thing that like.
If I had to define grace for me, like I think you said it already. It’s just like total trust and surrender and knowing that this journey that were on there is no destination and the the the things that we go through again, they’re there for distinct reasons. They’re making us become who we really want to be and if we can just surrender to what is knowing.
That whatever happens it’s going to take us to that destination and just like being the flow with the universe like stop trying to resist life. Stop trying to like go against it and just just flow with it and too late not like roll with the punches but like just like stop resisting. Yeah, but the universe is giving you because it’s all for a reason and so many people are like walking around earth like in such a tense ball like trying to like.
Deflect all these things and just like not feel it and it’s really sad to me that like more and more people these days like our are so terrified of a feeling pain of feeling heartbreak that they just don’t even open up their hearts to love and that’s me is like the biggest tragedy because you are loved.
So like it’s just very very sad like you’re rejecting Yourself by doing that and it’s just a tragedy and I don’t want people to be like that so you but yeah, so it’s there’s just so much that goes into it that we can’t even see that just dodge Crossing trusting that what we’re going through. Is going to serve us later.
It says taking us where we want to go. Yeah, so
Iviana: [00:50:53] what would you say to that in? You know, I really feel like the topic of this episode has really been a lot about trusting the journey and trusting like where you’re at. What would be something that you’d say to someone who? Speaking of comparison because I need to keep my promise.
But what would you say to someone who’s looking at? Somebody else’s journey and they’re like man. I want to be there. I want to be living that person’s life or I want to look like her or I want to be married to a guy like him or whatever you see out there. What would you say to them with the journey and related
Jamie: [00:51:23] to that?
I love that because there are so many women I used to do that. You cannot compare like. You are on your own path. Right what that person is doing has nothing to do with your healing. You’re only responsible for your experience. And if you’re focusing on all the things that you don’t have by comparing yourself to what this person has or what she looks like.
That’s that’s you’re operating from that place of fear and self-doubt and lack and limitation. You’re focusing on things that you don’t have but you want when what we need to focus on is, okay. Where am I now? How can I be grateful for what I do have and shift into that abundance mindset and that love face mindset of okay.
I thank God that I’m here with you know, thank God. I have my health. Obviously. Thank God that I am showing up for myself in this way. That is going to serve me for your some. You have no idea what that other person might be going through. They might be in so much pain emotionally and and so numb like you don’t know we can’t.
Make any judgments about what other people are doing just because it looks like they might have it all to I looked like I had my life so good. I pretended like I was like the happiest best like most from the outside looking in you would have thought like damn she has a doll man. She has it all. I hated myself.
I hated my life II was so insecure. You have no idea what that person is going through and so wishing for to be someone else you’re rejecting yourself and that’s only creating more disconnection and more pain when you could be feeling that love and that joy that you have that like everyone has access to it and by believing that that person has something that you don’t is just absolute bogus.
It’s just bogus. Yeah.
Iviana: [00:53:12] They’re me like one of the things that I’ve really dealt with a lot. You know you look at social media and you look at people living, you know sharing these awesome things and awesome experiences and. It hit me recently that you know when someone’s just not feeling well like when I’m not feeling well and I’m not feeling good.
I have no desire
Jamie: [00:53:31] to share you’re so right. No,
Iviana: [00:53:34] I really don’t understand. Why would anybody else have a desire to share anything when they’re not feeling good? And why do they need like do you really want
Jamie: [00:53:41] people to just share all their
Iviana: [00:53:43] junk
Jamie: [00:53:43] all over the place again want that really? It’s so true.
It’s such a good point to like, I’m right there with you I find on days where I’m like feeling a little bit. Are you know exposed or like not really myself? Like I can’t because because you and I do something we really like like to be the light of the world, right? We like to show people what they could have and like how how they can get from where they are now to where they want to go and if we’re having like a shit day or craft day and we don’t feel well we’re like, well, I don’t have anything motivating to post the like why post at all but here’s where it’s beautiful when we do post when we’re not having the best day.
That’s when you’re relatable. That’s when people can be like, okay. Okay, so she is actually a human. She’s not this robot that walks around that feels good all the time because nobody wants a coach or a mentor that can’t like relate to what they’re feeling. Yeah, we have to know and and at the end of the day, we’re all the same we’re all connected and we’re all feeling the same things and we’re all thinking the same thoughts.
And and that’s one of the things that I always say is like we all walk around thinking that our problems are like so. In number so crazy and no one’s going to like think that if we open up that what we’re feeling and what we’re thinking people are going to think we’re nuts. And then when you do you realize that that person has the same exact thoughts that you do and it’s feeling the same way that creates that connection and and.
We’re all like it’s just shows you how yeah, we might all be having different life experiences, but it comes down to we all have the same fears. It’s all the same fear of not being loved are not being seen as like for women. Our biggest fear is not getting love and men have their biggest fear is being seen as weak.
We. Yeah, yeah, that’s why I like Miss protector.
Iviana: [00:55:28] Yeah,
Jamie: [00:55:29] huh. That’s why there’s such a different than how men Express their emotions their taught like, okay, if that’s a weakness like you said. Yeah, like I can’t like I just have to and I’d that’s so evident and every single male including my own like family members, like if I if I show that I’m like upset right now or if I’m scared like that means I’m less of a man and that’s just simply not the case.
It actually makes you more of a man like actually make. You know what? I mean? Yeah, but it’s like there’s a subconscious fear
Iviana: [00:55:57] just last night. My son did something to my daughter and I like I scolded him. I kind of got on his butt about what he did and in reality. I was wrong. Like I didn’t stop and really pay attention to I had happened and I felt really bad because I was really hard on him and he was upset and he went off and then I realized like oh man I messed up and so I went up to him and I was like, I’m so sorry buddy, and I was apologizing to him and talking to him, you know, like I messed up.
I’m sorry. I’m so I feel so bad for doing
Jamie: [00:56:31] this
Iviana: [00:56:32] and my husband later on came to me and he’s like babe. I admire you so much and I. Like why and he’s like because I have such a hard time admitting that I’m wrong to the kids because I think it makes me feel weak and I was like, huh? Like I never thought about it that way like for me I’m so okay with it.
I’m like man I messed up. I am sad and I feel horrible about
Jamie: [00:56:55] it,
Iviana: [00:56:56] but my husband has
Jamie: [00:56:57] a way different mindset about it. And he’s like I’m going to work on it. I know it it’s so interesting. Yeah, that’s such a beautiful example to like because because if there. Are the provider if there are the protector and they show themselves like oh I messed up like my dad was the same way like it and now it’s like a jug like I’m never wrong like, you know, it’s kind of like the family joke like okay, you’re never wrong.
You’re always right, but it’s just so interesting how the dynamic and and admitting when they messed up is like admitting defeat. It’s like admitting that they they’re not in the and that’s the whole thing and all comes back down to being worthy if I admit defeat that. Not worthy. Yeah and this with us with women, like if I am not good enough or if I’m not perfect.
I’m not worthy or if I’m not loved, you know, all the things that’s it’s so interesting the different dynamic between the masculine and feminine energies and if we can be open and aware, so that aware of them like we can they can dance in the middle and it can be this beautiful thing. But if we don’t if we’re not open if we’re not aware of what we’re feeling and like what you did with your son last night is so beautiful and that’s.
Him a very important lesson right like admitting when you’re wrong and and and making sure that you know, just because you’re wrong doesn’t mean you’re a bad person just because you made a mistake doesn’t make you any less of a great mom, right? Hmm. Yeah.
Iviana: [00:58:23] Yeah, and it’s just it showed me just it just showed me such a big lesson on forgiveness, which is a whole nother
Jamie: [00:58:31] could talk about forgiveness for her.
However, I have a whole episode
Iviana: [00:58:35] on that
Jamie: [00:58:36] witch. A huge one
Iviana: [00:58:38] the time this goes live that one will already have gone live.
Jamie: [00:58:41] But yeah, man, the huge topic forgiveness. Yeah, you have to be able to forgive and not for the other person at like yeah for you like what when I look at my trauma and everything like I have total forgiveness and total love and actually so much compassion in my heart because here’s the beautiful thing that we don’t realize but people can’t treat us any worse than they’re treating themselves.
Know if he if someone did something awful to you, imagine how they’re treating themselves. It’s usually ten times worse. So having that compassion and knowing that when people hurt us, it’s from a place of woundedness. It’s from their own pain and and they don’t really realize what they’re doing is traumatic to us, right?
They’re just they’re doing what they know. To do to get love because at the end of the day, that’s all we want to feel. So Hayes defense mechanism was being like, you know, I do deserve love II like give me love give me love and you know, it’s just so that’s at the end of the day like I have so much compassion for what he must have been feeling and whatever, you know, what trauma he has because we all were all victims of victim.
We’re all victims of victims who it cannot
Iviana: [00:59:55] get full circle to the story that you shared in the very beginning about that guy and like I’ve ever experienced rejection and he lashed out when you rejected him. Can you imagine like that was a big deal for that was a bigger deal for him? Probably at the moment.
Jamie: [01:00:09] Honestly,
Iviana: [01:00:09] are you like for you it led you to healing
Jamie: [01:00:12] for him you like him? I don’t know because I honestly and I struggled with that for so long because I never got closure. I. Never got closure, and I remember my mentor Beetle that can you. Be okay with knowing that you’re never going to communicate with them is again, and at that time this was, you know years ago after it had first happened and I was like and I would I cried and I said no like I have to know that like and and now it’s I am okay with knowing like whatever happens is for the greater good and whatever will be will be but like it just takes when I was able to see like really what was going on again, like it was from a place of woundedness and and and how much pain.
I’ve been feeling and I don’t know what happens for him after that. But I I am better for it. I’m not sure how it serves him if it did it all. I don’t know. I hope I honestly do hope he’s doing well II need time. I think of guys that have hurt me. I like say a little prayer and I’m like, you know bless them.
I hope they’re happy. I hope there are you know Finding healing and love because I genuinely do because the more of us that he’ll the more of us that are able to wake up to our true. It like heals the collective pain of the world. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I
Iviana: [01:01:31] mean you’ve talked a lot about energy and all of that and it’s just it’s all circular
Jamie: [01:01:35] all connect
Iviana: [01:01:35] and I would say that that’s like the
Jamie: [01:01:37] ultimate epitome of Grace.
Yes, so true so beautiful. Yeah. Yes.
Iviana: [01:01:45] Well, Jamie I can talk to you
Jamie: [01:01:46] forever obvious idea how this is so great back on. Yeah anytime this was so much fun. Thank you so much for having me. I love chatting with you and it’s such a great
Iviana: [01:01:57] conversation. I loved it too. So tell us where we can find you what you’re working on.
I heard about a radio show really exciting
Jamie: [01:02:05] thing. Yeah. Yeah, lots of things man. A lot of things are happening right now and it’s so great. So my social media, you can find me on Instagram on Facebook. It’s Jamie Michelle ja mie Mich E.E. The number 11 e so instead of the double L’s and Michelle.
It’s the number 11, which I is one of my angel numbers and that’s the same thing for my website. It’s Jamie Michelle.com, but in place of the owls, it’s the number 11. Do not type in Jamie Michelle.com. It will take you somewhere. You don’t want to go. Well, I’m up for sure. Yeah, thank you. And I’m working right now.
Yeah, so I do have a radio show launching in September. So September 9th Monday September 9th at 9 p.m. It’s in the works still not sure what it’s going to be called yet. I’ll let you know and that goes live but I am taking on clients right now one-on-one. I have a few spots open which you can go to Jimmy machine.
You can go to my website and find the find the application for that. I would love to help you if you’re struggling with any of this stuff and then I have also. Weekly open group coaching calls which anyone can come to you. It’s every Thursday 7:00 p.m. Eastern. You can register on my website. It’s open to literally anyone and right now it’s free.
It’s free. It’s one hour group coaching for free until October 3rd. So if you want to you know, try and see what it’s like for you, I highly encourage you to come hang out. It’s such a fun time. It’s like just like this for hanging out and we’re just talking through and and sharing and there’s so much healing that takes place especially in a group setting because you can actually see that you’re really not alone.
Iviana: [01:03:45] Mmm. Well guys go look her up. She is awesome. I love following her on Instagram and just her insights and just everything. Ear about I’m just I’m excited for you and what the future brings.
Jamie: [01:03:56] All right. Awesome. Thank you so much of Jana.
Iviana: [01:04:06] Are you loving the podcast so far? Is it helping you learn different ways to give yourself Grace. I’m so glad and that’s why I’m taking it to the next level become a podcast supporter through the share the grace program and for only five dollars a month you’ll get. Access to bonus level content that takes the lessons from episodes like this one to a deeper level by providing you with ways to apply what you’ve learned plus some surprises along the way head to Ivana Bynum.com share the grace to sign up.
I can’t wait to see you there.
Jamie: [01:04:45] Hold up don’t leave yet.
Iviana: [01:04:53] I would love it. If you go to iTunes right now and leave a review. I want to hear what you have to say and it makes a huge difference. I’m getting other ears on this message and subscribe to so you can get the latest episodes and if this episode resonated share on Facebook or Instagram and tag me a Tiana Bynum.
Last but not least. I would love to keep in touch with you. So head over to Ivana Bynum.com and sign up for updates. I only contact when I have something good to share promise. Plus you’ll get a free gift right when you join. I share the strategies. I’ve learned for parents just like you and have lots of resources and courses ready for you right now.
Thank you so much and I’ll chat with you
Jamie: [01:05:41] soon.
