I’m thinking you need a bit more of a kick in the pants today.  You’ve been getting down and out over the same issue and you don’t know what to do.  You keep asking yourself why it keeps happening over and over, having the “why me” mentality yet you’re not willing to do the work.

Well, as a piggyback to the topic of change, I’d like to get a little deeper into the concept.

Often, we spend our lives dealing with problems that we’ve created for ourselves.  We don’t want to face them and they never go away.

The biggest thing you have to do to make change and find your purpose is to pull out the root of the problem.

Human nature wants you to continue on the roller coaster of life by doing only surface work on your issues.  We make it too hard for ourselves to change because were not willing to do the work to eliminate the deepest wounds.

Dealing with issues on a heart level is what starts to make the major changes in our lives.

You have to get to the root of your negative mindsets and attitudes and deal with it before you can actually move forward with your life.  Nothing will change until that begins to happen.

Digging deep is never easy.  It’s painful, sad, and uncomfortable at times.  But it is necessary.

Most of my life, I dealt with issues of abandonment.  I always felt let down by people.  I constantly thought that no one had my back, people were destined to hurt me, and they were going to let me down.  I never gave people a chance to help me and then I realized that I was dooming my own relationships with this mindset.

I finally realized that this was a problem.  I started to think long and hard about what it could be.  I obviously could not figure it out on my own.  I started to pray on it until recently, I started learning about dealing with issues on a heart level and how avoiding those issues can actually affect certain parts of your body or make you sick.

A light bulb finally went off in my head that showed me what it was.  I had issues with abandonment.  Where did this come from?

I have a vivid memory of one specific day as a little girl.  I was sitting in church with my mom looking around at other people.  I saw families.  To me, a family was supposed to be a mother, a father, and the children.  That’s what you had to have to be a “complete” family.  I didn’t know then that I was wrong.

At that moment, I made up a song in my head.  “Nobody loves me.. I am so lonely.. all I need is a family.”  I had decided in my mind at that moment that no one loved me.  Just because my father was never around based on his lifestyle I had made the decision that he didn’t love me, and in turn, no one else did either.

If you think about it, it made no sense.  My mother has always loved me.  She raised me on her own.  She provided for me.  I have family that loves me.  But in my head from then on, no one loved me.

I carried those feelings until I reached adulthood and lived the majority of my life thinking that no one loved me, everyone was going to let me down, and no one had my back.  I even dragged that mindset into my marriage.

All because of a decision that I made back when I was a little girl.

Most issues that repeat in your life started with one specific event.  You made a decision to feel a certain way at some point in your life.  You made that decision as a result of something that happened.  It’s up to you to work with God and yourself to do some soul searching.  Do the work to uproot the root of your issue.

Think about a problem that continues to pop up in your life.  Ask:

Where did it begin?

What started that problem?

You’ll be amazed at how it started.  It will most likely be a totally unrelated event in your life.

The feelings that you have will manifest themselves in your life and continue to repeat until you get to the core of the problem.

When you begin to deal with each problem, one by one, you will be drawn closer to your purpose.  It just starts with a little bit of digging.

The question for you now is, what is the issue that keeps coming up again in your life and in your relationships?  Leave your thoughts in the comments below.

Do know someone who has the same problem?  Please share this post with them and help me promote the digging to them too!